Saturday, April 29, 2006

Song Playing Inside my Head.



For You

I am a vision, I am justice
Never thought that I could love
Living in shadows, faded existence
It was never good enough
Within the darkness, you were the light
That shines away
You're trapped in violence, I can be the man
That saves the day

I'm there for you
No matter what
I'm there for you
Never giving up
I'm there for you
For you

Someone has changed me, something saved me
Now this is who I am
Although I was blinded, my heart let me find that
Truth makes a better man
I didn't notice that you were right in front of me
A mask of silence, we'll put away so we can see

I'm there for you
No matter what
I'm there for you
Never giving up
I'm there for you
For you

For you

Within the darkness, you are the light
That shines away
In this blind justice, I can be the man
That saves the day

I'm there for you
No matter what
I'm there for you
Never giving up

You know it's true
You were there for me
And I'm there for you
For you
For you
For you

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

THE HEAT

ANG IIIIIINEEEEEEEEEEEET!!!! I'm sweating like a pig right now. Third time to take a bath since I got home from work.

Anyway, a friend showed a great blog: postsecret.blogspot.com . I kinda can relate to some of it. hehehe!

Monday, April 24, 2006

The Guide.

There has been an alarming increase of stupid people in the world today. So here something for them to help them in life.

The Guide for Stupid People

• Don’t eat rocks.
• Don’t take naps in the road.
• Don’t stoke fires with your fingers.
• Don’t throw a brick straight up.
• Don’t breathe car exhaust.
• If you ever meet the President, don’t offer him the surprise gift of
a firearm by whipping it suddenly out of your coat pocket.
• For all pertinent tasks, use a hammer, not your fist.
• Walk around toxic waste dumps, not through them.
• Don’t stargaze with friends on a hilltop in a thunderstorm and use
metal fishing rods as pointers.
• The stuff on the bottom of your shoe is not for internal consumption.
• If you need to get somewhere, and a freight train heading in the
direction you’re traveling just happens to be nearby, resist the urge to stand in
front of it and grab hold as it passes.
• If your want to pound on the radiator to tell the landlord to turn up
the heat, don’t do it with your head.
• Don’t flip off the Mafia.
• If you’re riding a bicycle down a hill, turn your head before you
spit.
• Wash behind your ears, not behind your eyes.
• Light birthday cake candles from back to front.
• Don’t shave with a lawn mower.
• Just because your body has orifices doesn’t mean you should put
things into them.
• Don’t stick screwdrivers into electrical outlets.
• Although they are sold in grocery stores, batteries are not food. Do
not break them open and drink what’s inside.
• The warning “Don’t try this at home” really means “Don’t try this at
all.”
• Don’t bathe in a tub full of snow.
• Don’t iron clothes while wearing them.
• The expression “Life in the fast lane” should not inspire you to live
in the road.
• Don’t eat hot coals.
• Don’t escape in to jail.
• Don’t wash floors with cough syrup.
• Don’t kick porcupines with bare feet.
• Don’t sled down hills with interstates at the bottom.
• Sell at most one of your kidneys.
• Don’t lie down in a cattle pen.
• Forks need carry food no farther than your mouth.
• Don’t test the strength of your skull with a nail gun.
• Only squeeze the handle end of a sword.
• Don’t snap towels at passing cops.
• Don’t throw an angry cat straight up.
• Don’t lick dry ice.
• Before you leap upside down onto a trampoline, make sure it’s right
side up.
• Don’t pour salt in your eyes.
• Your body has the correct number of holes in it. Don’t make anymore.
• Don’t microwave yourself.
• Don’t chase a bear into the woods to get a close-up photo.
• Don’t swallow toothpaste.
• Don’t chew Tylenol.
• Don’t bathe in gasoline.
• Don’t sneak up to a stallion and whack it on the rump.
• Don’t drink water that comes from swimming pools, puddles, bathtubs,
dishpans, sewage pipes, radiators, oceans, acid rain, or toilet bowls.
• Don’t stick body parts into electrical outlets.
• Don’t listen to music from the Spice Girls.
• Don’t lick toads, bulls, or jellyfish.
• Don’t go swimming in a well.
• Rake leaves, not people.
• Shovels are for digging holes in the ground, not the floor of your
house.
• Contrary to popular opinion, you’re not supposed to strip the
protective rubber coating off electrical wires before plugging them in.
• If you want to chew gum, buy some. Don’t use the gum from underneath
the seats at schools and movie theaters even though it’s free.
• Don’t kick stone walls very hard without wearing thick-soled shoes or
boots.
• Even if you need to get downstairs quickly, don’t jump out of a
window - - use the stairs.
• When using an acetylene torch, don’t feel the flame to see if it’s
sufficiently hot.
• Better yet, stay away from acetylene torches altogether.
• Walking barefoot in the sand is good. Walking barefoot on a cactus
is bad.
• Elvis is dead. Get over it.
• Wear clothes.
• Use a pot holder when removing items from the oven.
• If you’re on a ball field and someone shouts “heads up!” don’t
actually raise your head up. Cover it with your arms and duck.
• Don’t drink.
• Don’t drive.
• Don’t tie yourself to an airplane propeller.
• Don’t brush your teeth with a wire-bristled sanding wheel.
• When using a weed whacker, don’t hold the end with the wire.
• When using a blow gun - - something you should always have a very
good reason for doing anyway - - draw your breath before placing your lips
around the barrel.
• No matter how tempting it is to be one with nature, stay on the
outside of all fences at the zoo.
• Give me all your money.
• When sticking thumb tacks into bulletin boards, press on the flat
end.
• Toasters should be used to cook bread, not your hands.
• Under no circumstances should you ever reproduce.

by: samuel stoddard

Saturday, April 22, 2006

Graduation Phobia

Its Vice graduation today. I didn't go even though my mom insisted that I go. I just have to make some lame excuse that I'm not feeling well. Never told anyone this before why I don't like graduations, but I really need to get this out and this is the best way of doing it, by posting it in the net where everyone is free to see it. Hehehe!

I think it was my high school graduation that cause this dislike for graduations. During this time we where having some financial difficulty so my parents were not in the best mood, but a week before that we all went to my brother and sister's graduation and you can see them with their smiles. Me on the other hand was a whole different story. My dad was the only one to see me walk the stage. I can remember that day so vividly. Everyone one was there with their parents and relatives all smiling ,all happy. I can see my dad filled with problems and wishing that the whole thing was over so we can go home. After the graduation we went home to see my mom screaming at everyone coz we were late for a party at a family friends. So without much as a congratulations we went to the party.

I'm not blamimg my parents for this or anything. We work that out a long time ago. But its still difficult for me to attend any graduation. Come to think of it I haven't attended any graduation since then. I guess the wounds are still here just covered with lies and smiles.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Song of the week



SICK CYCLE CAROUSEL

if shame had a face I think it would kind of look like mine
if it had a home would it be my eyes
would you believe me if I said I'm tired of this
well here we go now one more time

I tried to climb your steps
I tried to chase you down
I tried to see how low I could get down to the ground
I tried to earn my way
I tried to change this mind
you better believe that I have tried to beat this

so when will this end it goes on and on
over and over and over again
keeps spinning around I know that it won't stop
till I step down from this for good

well I never thought I'd end up here never
thought I'd be standing where I am
I guess I kind of thought that it would be easier than this
I guess I was wrong now one more time

I tried to climb your steps
I tried to chase you down
I tried to see how low I could get down to the ground
I tried to earn my way
I tried to change this mind
you better believe that I have tried to beat this

so when will this end it goes on and on
over and over and over again
keeps spinning around I know that it won't stop
till I step down from this
sick cycle carousel
this is a sick cycle yeah
sick cycle carousel
this is a sick cycle yeah

so when will this end it goes on and on
over and over and over again
keeps spinning around I know that it won't stop
till I step down from this for good

so when will this end it goes on and on
over and over and over again
keeps spinning around I know that it won't stop
till I step down from this for good
sick cycle carousel
sick cycle carousel
sick cycle carousel
sick cycle carousel

Something I did with a headache

Work has been a great opportunity for me to realize that I didn’t change as much as I thought I did. I thought that I stop caring about other people that I have become something that just exist in this earth without purpose in life. But teaching others even online has made me realize how much I love to help others and them just saying thank you to me has brought me great joy already.

I think most of the time when we get hurt, we try to run away from the things that cause us pain; we just want the hurting to stop. That why man has developed defense mechanism to overcome these problems and worries that we all face daily. However, these things are not always good.

For me example, I got hurt so many times that I don’t remember most of them and certainly not the details of those I do, but I build this wall around me that has cause me to forget on how to appreciate life itself.

Well life has a good way on knocking some senses to someone like me. It didn’t happen all of a sudden, no great apparition of angels that would tell me how good life is and that problems are just there make it beautiful and make one strong. Life made me meet many good people with lives so interesting that it made check up on my life. I saw others deal with same problems I have n different ways. It actually made me smile to realize I was normal that I wasn’t an outcast in this world, but I can actually count on others for help and I can also do it to them. As they say it, “life is wonderful”.

Friday, April 14, 2006

BANKAI!

Life is Wonderful!

Work has been a great opportunity for me to realize that I didn’t change as much as I thought I did. I thought that I stop caring about other people that I have become something that just exist in this earth without purpose in life. But teaching others even online has made me realize how much I love to help others and them just saying thank you to me has brought me great joy already.

I think most of the time when we get hurt, we try to run away from the things that cause us pain; we just want the hurting to stop. That why man has developed defense mechanism to overcome these problems and worries that we all face daily. However, these things are not always good.

For me example, I got hurt so many times that I don’t remember most of them and certainly not the details of those I do, but I build this wall around me that has cause me to forget on how to appreciate life itself.

Well life has a good way on knocking some senses to someone like me. It didn’t happen all of a sudden, no great apparition of angels that would tell me how good life is and that problems are just there make it beautiful and make one strong. Life made me meet many good people with lives so interesting that it made check up on my life. I saw others deal with same problems I have n different ways. It actually made me smile to realize I was normal that I wasn’t an outcast in this world, but I can actually count on others for help and I can also do it to them. As they say it, “life is wonderful”.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

REPORT FOR THE MONTH APRIL

I had time to reflect on life lately. This is my report.

I’m still very much out of shape, started exercising a week ago, so results are still not visible. I also started controlling my food intake. This is very hard, considering I’m surrounded by good food.

I finally got a job as online English teacher for Koreans. Not the best job in the world for me but who am I demand such things. I've already passed the first week of training, so far everything is good. My fellow employees are really great; I had no problem in adjusting in the work area.

My love life is still practically non-existent due to my inability to put in effort into anything I'm supposed to do. Aside from the fact, I really suck in this dating thing. I really like someone and wanted to do something about it, but I have no idea what to do. So if anyone is reading this could you at least give me some advice. Thank you.

As for my mental well-being, I can honestly say, I'm perfectly normal in the standards of our society. Quirks and minor neurotic conditions still exist, but everyone has them, so no problem there I think.

Financially speaking, I’m still bankrupt. At least, now that I have a job income will start coming in soon. Unfortunately, half of it now goes to some stuff I’ve wanted to buy for a very long time. There goes the savings.

Spiritually speaking, I’m still lacking a great deal. I’m having a hard time forgiving myself (IDIOT!). But at least I’m way better compared a couple of months ago, when the very idea of God loving me and wanting me to come back to his presence was unacceptable.

And yes, I have a new nickname: BRAD. I know it’s weird that I have that nickname but who am I to argue with my boss. So there you have it, you may now call me Brad and laugh at the same time.