I finally prayed...

It has been a couple of years now since knelt down in earnest prayer. It is quite odd for someone like me who was born and raise in our church. I even served a mission. but when I came back praying became more of duty than gift that should treasured. I won't share the reason behind though.

At first, I tried kneeling in prayer but my mind was blank. I had no words to say to Him and doubt was creeping in my mind if it was worth the effort (it has been years why start again I did survive). Then I remembered one class in sunday school when I was a kid, that you can start a prayer with song. I remembered my favorite song, it was "O Lord, My Redeemer". A song we sang much when I was still in a choir (I use too sing :P).

And the Roman soldiers laughed
When they saw their pris'ner stumble.
He did not revile them back.
And wondering, I asked,
"Who was this man so humble?"

And a woman at my side
Choked on her reply.
Though she struggled not to weep,
The tears poured down her cheek,
Her heart breaking as she cried:

"Oh Lord, my Redeemer,
Thou has done so much for me!
Oh Lord, my Redeemer,
All my love I give to Thee!"

And the crowd went pushing on.
I felt compelled to follow.
I knew that they were wrong
How they mocked Him all along.
Suddenly my heart felt hollow.

For they nailed Him to a tree
On a hill called Calvary.
While I stood there filled with wonder,
The heavens roared with thunder,
And again I heard this plea:

"Oh Lord, my Redeemer,
Thou has done so much for me!
Oh Lord, my Redeemer,
All my love I give to Thee!"

I could not forget His face
As I wandered from that place.
With the questions ever burning
I put myself to learning
And each answer came with grace.

And I knelt in earnest prayer,
His memory still there.
And the more that I'd enquire
The hotter burned the fire.
I found joy beyond compare.

And the day turned into three.
Morning found me in a garden
Where the gentle April breeze
Returned me to my knees,
Pleading for a pardon.

And I can't say when or why
I opened up my eyes
But his feet were there before me,
But His hands were open o'er me,
And His face I recognized.

"Oh Lord, my Redeemer,
Thou has done so much for me!
Oh Lord, my Redeemer,
All my love I give to Thee!"

I started to crying when I needed my prayer and ended up pouring out my heart. All the aches and pains, doubts, hate and dreams, and I mean everything. It was wonderful to be able to that for a long time. I guess this the first step and hopefully not the last.

NIGHTMARE

I couldn’t move and really didn’t want too. I was bound by chains that seem to pierce my body multiple times. There were three in each arm, four in each leg, one in each shoulder, one through the chest and three in stomach. I couldn’t see where the chains began or ended, I can see only where it entered in my body, with blood and gore dripping in the chains. The links of the change were made from different materials, although I had no idea how. It held me in place, I couldn’t move, but I wasn’t scared, in fact I felt safe. The safest I felt in years, even though it was scary and I was paralyzed I felt like I was in a sanctuary of some sort. Then everything seems to move slowly, the clink of chains and the grinding of metal to bone and flesh. At first, I wanted to scream as though I have been doing this for years but nothing came out of my mouth. I was tired, I felt numb. I was expecting pain but emptiness has replaced it.

I finally saw the end of chains, jagged prongs much like what you see in meat shop, all rusty and seemed to be encrusted in something black which have the stench of rotten meat and for a moment it was first time I smelled something but it felt I already knew it before. In one swift motion they seem to rip me apart. I was barely whole and was falling pretty fast, and still there was no fear, no pain, and as if I was expecting it all to happen.

I falling pretty fast that I could barely see anything around me, well maybe for that thing the use to be my hand or liver. Oddly, I started to slow down until I gradually came to a halt. Smiling or at least I thought I was with the thought that I really didn’t miss much on my way down. The walls were bare and gray; there wasn’t much to see except for a few vital organs by my side.

As I lay there waiting, I heard familiar footsteps. Calmly waiting for the person I knew to approach me already, I began to think of what I would like for dinner, though I highly doubted it would be possible given my condition at the moment. Then the footsteps stopped and I was staring directly at myself, for the first time I felt fear. Fear so great I ended screaming myself up.

In much pain right now.

I sprain my ankle yesteday (It's my first time :P). It still hurt like hell when I try to move it. I already tried hot and cold compress but I guess I have to wait for three days, to feel better.

ONE HAPPY BUNNY!!!

FOR APRILE!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

It's Alive!!!

My PC is back in action! After experiencing the blue screen of death (Damn you windows!). Unfortunately I have to install everything all over again. Oh well, life's a bitch. You just need to learn how to deal with her.

STUCK AT WORK

My head is spinning already. I'll be going home only to take a bath.

Identity Crisis - What is in a name?

(Taken from Jak) Rules are simple, list all the different names people have for you and who they are. :D

Ms. Urim- Most people who has no idea if I'm a guy or a girl. Apparently my name is a girl's name to some countries

U- most of my friends do

Elder Hernandez/Elder- during my missionary days. I actually felt weird to be called by my first name when I got back

Propeta- from one member in Luna, La Union from my missionay day

Urin- from those kids who like to tease me.

ihi- more of an insult actually

Dwayne Johnson/The Rock- by NWA friends. Must learn how to raise the eyebrow

Daddy/Daddy U- only use by my "kids" in the MIR.

Kuya/Kuya u/Kuyau-from kids to people I have kuya complex on

Macauly Culkin- (di ko alam kung tama ang spelling) from adults who thought i was cute when a kid.

Matet- from adults who really thought I was cute when I was a kid.

Ugh- like the cartoon character from the cartoon network. Its my initials.

HERNANDEZ!- from my teachers who caught me sleeping ( may kasama pang "go home and plant kamote!)

Mike- from DBG people who thinks I look like Mike Valencia

bunny/hunny/tummy/piggy- only Aprile is allowed to call me this, unless you wanna argue with her.

THANK YOU J.O.R.

for making our face hurt from laughing...

No Guts, No Glory [Taken from Nick]

Statistically speaking, unless you are a total hermit, a social retard, or ugly as a putrid bum, there is at least one person in your multiply network that has a crush on, wants to date you, wants to sleep with you or simply just wants to kiss you. So... let's play "No Guts, No Glory!"

The rules are simple.

1. If you want to date the person who posted this, send a Personal Message, not a reply to this post, saying "Coffee?"
2. If you have a crush on the person who posted this, send a Personal Message saying"You're hot!"
3. If you just want to sleep with them & stay friends, send them a message that says "Nice shoes!"
4. If you simply just want to kiss the person who posted this, send a Personal Message saying, "I do!"

SCARED?

The only rule is that, you must not make anyone who sends you a personal message feel stupid for feeling that way about you. Acknowledge. Say thank you. Move on.

IF YOU'VE READ THIS, YOU HAVE TO REPOST THIS, EVEN IF YOU'RE TAKEN & see who replies.

SO... re-post this as "No Guts, No Glory", as it doesn't matter if you're married, in a relationship, or single.

You opened it so you HAVE to repost it! A test of your bravery!

Memories

I saw an old picture of mine back when I was still a missionary. Yes people! I was once in my life a Mormon missionary (Di halata noh!) . It brought back a lot of good and bad memories. All the miles we walked, the times you got chased by dogs, being called a cult and in one case an antichrist. All the tears you cried and the laughter’s you shared with the people you have learn to love. Something I will cherish for the rest of my life.

Me Want Cookie!

You Are Cookie Monster

Misunderstood as a primal monster, you're a true hedonist with a huge sweet tooth. You are usually feeling: Hungry. Cookies are preferred, but you'll eat anything if cookies aren't around. You are famous for: Your slightly crazy eyes and usual way of speaking How you life your life: In the moment. "Me want COOKIE!"

The Sesame Street Personality Quiz

IT SOMETIMES HELP TO HAVE SOMEONE SAY THAT WHAT YOU'RE THINKING IS STUPID...

Happy Ending lyrics

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life
Can't get no love without sacrifice
If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well
A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell

This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, or love, or glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' everyday

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

2 o'clock in the morning, something's on my mind
Can't get no rest; keep walkin' around
If I pretend that nothin' ever went wrong, I can get to my sleep
I can think that we just carried on

This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, or love, or glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' everyday

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

A Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love [repeat]

I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' everyday

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
To live the rest of our life,
But not together.

I'

My new love... the beauty salon

I never quite understood before why a lot of people love going to beauty salons. Its expensive, and hair will eventually grow back anyways. I really didn't care what my hair looks like, as long that its there i'm ok. Until it was pointed out to me that I look like crap and the stress was showing itself to blatantly. I realized that I wasn't taking care of myself anymore.

So I decided to go to the nearest salon I can find and have myself a haircut. As the stylist (that's their job title, so from now I will call them stylist :P) asking me what I wanted, he also keep on suggesting treatments I should also have. I actually heard of those things but have no idea what it actually is, so decided to get the hair spa as well (it actually had a free haircut, so what the heck)

It was actually very relaxing that i was trying to fight myself from dozing off. It really felt good and I looked human again. The stress i was feeling was greatly reduced by the hair spa and hair cut. Two birds in one stone. hehehe!

Now I'm contemplating on what to try next time (those facial treatments sounds interesting). So the next I feel stressed out, you'll know where to find me. hehehehe

Staying Alive

Stole this from Duday, got some pretty interesting answer. Aprile made sure I answered honestly. hehehehe!

Rules:
> Put your music player on shuffle.
> For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
> You must write down that song title no matter how silly it sounds!

If someone says "is that okay", you say?
Wish You were here by Incubus

What would best describe your personality?
Tears to Shed by Helena Bonham Carter in the Corpse Bride
(I’m a talking corpse)

What do you like in a girl/boy?
Guerilla Radio by Rage against the Machine

(Kailangan kaya niyang mahalin ang isang bakulaw na katulad ko)

How do you feel today?
Angels by Robbie Williams

(I’m gonna die soon! huhuhuhu!)

What is your life's purpose?
Love you till the end by The Pogues
(Masaya yung katabi ko)

What is your motto?
She loves you by the Beatles
(huh?)

What do your friends think of you?
Stuck in the Middle by Mika

(stuck between the middle of what?)

What do you think of your parents?
Ang Pag-ibig kong ito by Moonstar 88
(di naman!)

What do you very often think about?
Crossroads by Cream
(decisions, decisions, desicions)

What do you think of your bestie?
Gemini by Spongecola'
(Thank God my best friend is also my Girlfriend!)

What do you think of the person you like?
Now comes the night by Rob Thomas
(:P sa kin na lang yun)

What is your life story?
Iris by Goo goo Dolls
(ang drama naman)

What do you want to be when you grow up?
Take it off by the Donnas

(Oo inaamin gusto kong maging Callboy!)

What do you think when you see the person you like?
Vanilla Ice Cream by Stephen Lynch
(very true!)

What do your parents think of you?
How do you do by Roxette
(huh?)

What will they play at your funeral?
Wherever I May Roam by Metallica
(kahit sa kabilang buhay pakalat-kalat ako)

What is your hobby, or interest?
No such thing by John Mayer
(My Schizophrenia is back, no such thing as the real world daw eh!)

What is your biggest fear?
Way back into love by Hugh Grant and Drew Barrymore
(yup, love is a scary thing)

What is your biggest secret?
Phantom of the Opera by Gerard Butler and Emmy Rossum
(Hehehehe!)

What song will be the subject when you repost?
Staying Alive by the Bee Gees

GOING BEYOND YOUR BODy'S LIMIT...

wlll cause you to shut down for a day. Trust me on that, I learned it the hard way.

The Square Root of 3

BY KUMAR

I'm sure that I will always be
A lonely number like root three

The three is all that's good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath the vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine

For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic

I know I'll never see the sun, as 1.7321
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality
When hark! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three

As quietly co-waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer

We break free from our mortal bonds
With the wave of magic wands
Our square root signs become unglued
Your love for me has been renewed

I know it's lame to most people but i kinda like it :)

DO NOT ARGUE WITH YOUR BOSS YOU WILL LOOSE...:)

I love you Piggy

Happy Monthsary!